Marketing, Astros and Turbans

Firstly I totally understand the importance of Departments and whilst we all have hard, challenging jobs and roles at work and at home, there are certain things that I can’t just leave alone. Today I experienced first hand the flawed and mind-boggling logic behind our Marketing Team.

So without using too many colours to paint the scene, I have been running my depot these last few days. I am greeted with the message as I walked back in from the yard to contact, umm… let’s call him Alan from Marketing. Now the message was one of panic, one that seemed to hint that the sole reason of the call was to draw concern and a furied haste from me. Now what could it have been? A missed promotion, a last-minute visit planned or an embarrassing missed proof read on a document that I’d signed off?

Well it was down to a Branch Promotion set up to challenge our biggest rivals, a strategic direct marketing plan to peg them back in a fashion like the arrows on the beginning of Dads Army, poking away at them until they finally retreated. As I called I am told that the email sent to me indicated a selection of Petrol Stations close to our depot in a location that they were based and that I could simply select one to have some “free” advertising set up to inform customers of our Depot.

I understand that Marketing Departments are constructed of people who earn decent money, they are the brains of the company who can steer us into a direction that wasn’t clear to anybody Non-Marketing. That makes up roughly 98% of the people in this country* As I read across I couldn’t help but notice that the postal codes of these Garages were in Enfield, a whole 60 miles away!

So as I told…… Oh yes sorry, Alan, that this proposal wasn’t the slightest bit of use to me or my depot! I am sure I put it with a few more choice words but as I indicated to him that Luton was only 20 miles from me and in my delivery area he realised that the document and email carefully constructed had about as much credibility as Paul Gascoigne applying for a Rail Card!

It was when I suggested to him that our Canning Town Depot 10 miles away would benefit from this location that he realised it was all flawed, to make things even more concerning they weren’t even on the original list of depots to benefit from this! Simply mind-boggling and slightly concerning!

* Made up statistic by me and after this error I’m sure it’s nearer 99% which includes Alan.

Top v Bottom in the form of the MLB (That’s Major League Baseball to all my non following readers) It couldn’t have been simpler, well it shouldn’t have been. That’s why Baseball is oh so completely unpredictable and in typical fashion as soon as I am getting carried away my beloved Boston Red Sox showed how to not only lose to the worst team in MLB, but also in the process they managed to avoid scoring any runs! I am certain that tonight’s second game in this series will be different, well in saying that nothing is predictable.

Finally I see a lot of sights in Queens Park which is where I work in Bedford. Today I couldn’t help but chuckle to myself. As I was walking to grab some food for Lunch, I saw one of the many Sikhs walking towards my direction. It wasn’t until we passed each other that I realised he was talking to someone, this was despite not having anyone next to him. It was as he passed I noticed he had his Nokia wedged firmly in his Turban in such a manner it replicated that of a Handsfree Kit, now that is why I love Queens Park! Diverse Culture at its absolute best.

sikh-hands-free-headset

DarcyB

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Posted on August 6, 2013, in Baseball, Humour and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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